


I Can't

by KuroTsubasa



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Angst, Bad Ending, Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-25
Updated: 2014-07-25
Packaged: 2018-02-10 08:55:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2018922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KuroTsubasa/pseuds/KuroTsubasa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Koujaku finally finds Aoba after all these years, and he is determined to rescue him, even if he has to die.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't

**Author's Note:**

> So the idea came to me when I read a comic drew by a person on tumblr ewe I really love it because I agree with it 100%. Hope some of you out there can enjoy this very lazily written piece of work.

It’s the same as usual.

Deadly silence. Occasionally I hear the wind outside.

Nothing else.

My daily life.

“…ba.”

_A voice…_

“…ba!”

_Sounds familiar…but that’s impossible._

“Aoba!”

_But it sounds like…Kou…jaku…_

“Aoba! Aoba, please, open your eyes!”

I struggle to open my eyes, briefly wondering how long I’ve been laying on Trip’s bed. As I slowly come to my senses, I realise I’m looking at the cake stand near Trip’s bed. Seeing how the source of the voice isn’t there, I slowly turn my head and I see a blur. At first. Once I blink a couple more times, I manage to make out a face once familiar.

“Thank god…” I watch as the figure on top of me wraps his arms around my skinny body and embrace me as gently as possible. The texture of his red kimono, and the feel of his warm chest strikes my heart, and I blink awake. It was Koujaku. It really is Koujaku.

“I can’t believe I found you after all these years…A-Aoba.” I can hear his voice to start trembling and breaking apart as something wet kisses the bridge of my nose. The Koujaku I knew would never shed his tears so easily like this. But then again, with the amount of time that’s passed, who can say?

“Can you stand? E-easy now…” I groan as Koujaku try to sit me up, the pain from the wounds left on my body aching once again. His movements pause, and I can feel his eyes observing the marks over my body, even with my head hanging. I don’t feel ashamed anymore however. I’ve learned to get used to it, since it’s pointless to cover myself if I’m uncovered all the time.

“Those bastards…what have they done to you?”

I don’t answer his question. I don’t know what I should say. Should I say thank you? Exclaim out of happiness? Cry?

“…Where are Virus and Trip…?”

My voice sounds coarse and dry, and I don’t even know if I managed to say anything. But if I did, then it’s the first sentence I have said in years. All the other sounds I make are for Virus and Trip, they don’t count.

“Gone, for now. They left on some holiday, so I broke in. My gang is keeping watch but we have to go.” His voice turns sharp and cautious, and he holds my hand to help me get to my feet. My entire body is shaking uncontrollably, and I will probably fall if I tried to take one step.

“Oh, hold on.” He leaves my hands for a moment, and I barely manage to stay upright on my feet. I watch as he strips off his kimono without hesitation, and swiftly wraps it around me. It’s just like how he would wrap cloaks around his customers to prevent hair falling on their clothes. But with much more care and tenderness.

“There, now we’re ready.”

I watch as he takes my hand and leads me out of Trip’s room, and it seems like we’re on the 2nd floor of a mansion. I never really knew what kind of place I was kept in, not that I ever needed to.

“I’ve been looking for you ever since you disappeared Aoba. Everyone thought you were…dead, but I just couldn’t accept that. I’ve been holding onto hope-” Koujaku pauses in his words as the his coil starts to ring under his left arm band. He stops in his steps and pushes his wristband back to take the call. I look around and realise that we’re in some sort of dining area, and the door is at the end of the other hall.

_Maybe…maybe I…_

_Finally…I can…_

“What is it?” Koujaku’s voice distracts me from my thinking and I turn to look at him as he listens in on one of his rib team member’s report.

“Bad news boss. The twins are on their way.”

“What?! Are you sure?”

“Yea, they just passed our checkpoint.”

_Thump. Thump._

“Fuck. How much time do we have?”

I can barely hear Koujaku’s voice. All I can hear right now is my own heartbeats. My forehead feels damp, but I guess my whole body would be damp as well, since I’m sweating so much.

“At their speed? Four minutes.”

I can feel a sudden chill running down my back, and it doesn’t go away. It stays at the bottom of my spine, and it grows. I clutch onto Koujaku’s kimono he’s wrapped around me, but the coldness is still filling my body.

“That’s plenty. Have Riku bring the car around. Tell him to be ready to fly.

Koujaku doesn’t notice my trembling and shivering while he’s busy on the phone, and I start looking around. I don’t know what exactly I’m looking for, but I know for sure that I need to do something.  Then, out of the corner of my eyes, I see something glimmering.

“Roger.”

“Ok Aoba we have to move.” Koujaku finishes his chat and puts his wristband back on. When he hears no response, he turns around to check on me. His eyes turn when he sees the state I’m in.

“A-Aoba, what’s wrong? You’re shaking…” He walks back towards me, reaching out his arms and gently placing one on my shoulder, the other on the top of my head. He wants to get a good look at my face, and he starts to brush aside my strands of hair.

“You…need to go.” I whisper out, making sure I was speaking each word clear enough for Koujaku to hear. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what’ll happen to him if he doesn’t leave. I don’t know how to explain it to him, but I know that I need to get him away. Away from this place.

“What? No! I am not leaving without you.” Koujaku responds within my expectation, but this time it creates trouble for me. For once, I wish he’d just leave. He can see my face clearly now, and he sighs softly. He focuses his gaze onto me, speaking with a serious tone.

“I’d rather die, than give up on you.” I slowly turn my eyes up at him, and I observe him. He really does mean it. But that’s just like him. His expression is a conflicted one now, full of sorrow and grief, and some hatred within it. Probably at Virus and Trip for making me this way. _If he says so then…_

“I understand.” I whisper again, looking down at the floor again. I can hear Koujaku breathing out a sigh of relief, and I feel his hands leaving my shoulders.

“Okay good. Everything will be fine, alright? But we have to hurry-” He speaks with reassurance and a hint of urgency, as if hoping to calm me down and trying to get me to move, getting out of this place for now. I wait until he’s turned with his back facing me, and I reach out my hand. When I feel him flinch, I then bring my hand from under his arm and wrap it around his body.

“W-whoa, A-Aoba?” His voice stutters, and I can feel a hint of embarrassment from it.

Then, his body freezes.

I muster up all the strength I have within my weakened body, and I push the knife as deep as possible. Trip always kept his knives sharp and clean at all times, so it wasn't too hard.

The sound rippled throughout the empty mansion, and I can hear sounds of fighting outside. Virus and Trip must have caught Koujaku’s men.

My hands tremble as I clutch the handle of the knife and pushes into Koujaku further. I can’t feel him struggle at all though. Maybe he’s too shocked to do anything.

_Drip. Drip._

He gasps, and lets out choking sounds.

I hear the sound of his sword dropping to the floor, still sheathed.

And then, Koujaku’s legs give away. I still have my arm around him, so I follow him as he collapses, making sure the knife was still within his body. When I feel his body completely limp, I stand back up slowly. The knife is still within my hand, and I slowly release my grip.

The knife drops to the ground with a loud clink, and the blood on it flows onto the marble floor, creating an abstract shape that looks somewhat tragic. I slowly turn, realising my body isn’t shaking or trembling anymore. I ignore the fact and start to turn back around, towards the way I came from. The way that I belong to.

I take my first step, and I feel a sudden force pulling me back. I turn slightly, casting my eyes down at Koujaku’s hand that’s clutching the hem of his kimono. It’s admirable how strong his grip is, despite just being stabbed by someone.

By his best friend.

By his childhood friend.

By me.

“…Aoba…Why…?” His words are breathless, and they sound like words of a dying man. I guess he is though. His breathing is uneven, and sweat is running down his bare back. I don’t know what to say to him. _Do I apologise? Laugh? Cry without a word?_

“…I…” I start the sentence, ready to speak a simple apology. But I don’t. I close my lips and turn away. I lift my arms slightly, and Koujaku’s kimono comes off easily enough. The feel of the kimono sliding off my body is a calming sensation, but after it comes off comes a cold chill. I ignore it and start to walk back towards that room, without looking back at Koujaku once.

I can feel his gaze on me, but I continue anyways.

After all, he said so himself.

He said, “I’d rather die, than give up on you.”

So, that’s what I did.

It's what he wanted.

 

 

[Link to the comic here!](http://peppermintbee.tumblr.com/post/92502422221/cognitive-dissonance-after-many-weeks-of-working)


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